Samus Arun - Mongoloid Slime





So you play all the way through Metroid and the hero Samus takes off the helmet and SHIT IN MY VAGINA! IT'S A BITCH NOT A BASTARD! HOLY FUCK THAT IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AMAZING KEKEKEKE!

Like, seriously, am I supposed to be impressed? Samus Arun, the original girl power, like it's some sort of fucking achievment that someone without a schlong could shoot the fuck out of aliens and shit WE ALL SAW ALIEN 3 WE KNOW SIGOURNEY RIPLEY COULD DO IT BEFORE THIS IRON-MAN LOOKALIKE TART! Y'know, I've just about had enough of this rancid old shit swallower. She needs some hot bukkake action in her uptight little face. Bitch has some reeeeeal attitude on her. And I'm not being bitter because she blew me off at the Nintendo corporation dinner so she could blowJOB my FUCKING BROTHER UNDER THE TABLE WHICH I SO SAW HER DO!

Oh she thinks she's the fucking bee's knees, well she's the knees of NOTHING! She thinks she can ignore Lu-fukken-igi just because she's the big Nintendo diva? If I had tits and a cunt I'd be TEN TIMES the diva she is! But nooooo, the only man she can fuck is Mario the disgusting, slovenly piece of vulgar whitetrash cuntlicking ass exploiting dirty boner biting fucktardwank.Someone needs to crack her space helmet while the slut's in outer space, then the vaccuum would so totally suck her face out of her helmet and her cellulite-ridden body would follow like she follows musty cock into public toilets. Ooh, then someone needs to catch all her manked up body liquid mangled shit up and put it in a bowl so I can fuck it and it'll be like raping a Samus drink but more disgusting! That would SO fukken teach the bitch for brushing me off.

I wanted to go to space. I could've been an awesome Samus. But no, they wanted someone with a pussy so they could be shocking and oh so fukken special. What would've been more special? Some rancid slapper nobody cares about, or the dashing space hero actually being the Green Machine himself? Yeah, fucking thought so. Once again Nintendo fuck themselves in the ass (makes a change from Sega doing it) and has some bedraggled old wench come out, who would actually be too busy mentruating to actually fight fucking aliens! She won't be mentruating with a sewn up cunt though, because that's what I'm doing, SEWING UP THE FUCK OUT OF HER CUNT! In fact, I'll get the bitch pregnant, and THEN sew her cunt up, and when she's pushing out the fucking baby, she CAN'T, and she's got this kid half stuck in her, trapped because her disgusting, AIDS ridden cunny is sealed off forevermore. Aw man, that would be fucking hilarious. She'd be screaming at this forced, unnatural labour, and the baby would be so, so scared, and would probably be cut up by the stitching as it slices through its soft flesh a bit, and she'd be lying there, chained up in my dungeon, both her and her bastard child in so much pain and weeping bitterly with such dread and mortal fear. And I will be laughing, the proud father.

The proud father with his traditional round of cigars, except THESE cigars are to be lit and then stubbed out on her diseased baby and bleeding cuntlips! HA! That would so fukken rule! It would be worth siring and losing an heir just to put someone I don't like through utter misery. Especially if I'm doing them up the ass at the same with with a cheesgrater strapped to my cock. I wish I could cum bleach so I could ejaculate real life bleach up that sluthole's sluthole.

It's not my fault, y'know? It really isn't my fault. I WAS CREATED A MONSTER, NOT BORN! If you're upset by anything I write, then take a long hard look at fukken society and see where this shit comes from. And know that for every NES design GBA you buy, that you KEEP THIS SHIT ALIVE!



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