An open letter to my dear, dear brother

Just look at you, you smug cunt. Growing fat off of my hard fucking work. Who bought the van for the family business? ME. Who bought those state of the art plungers? ME!!!!

But oh no, all that changes once we get out of the real fucking World and we go to your precious Mushroom Fucked Up Kingdom. Oh, then Mario's the star. He gets to fuck Peach in the ass while I'm stuck with that whore Daisy. When does Luigi get his share, huh? WHEN DOES LUIGI GET HIS FUCKING SHARE????

How could mom like you best, you pudgy sack of shit? How could she favour a dwarven, deformed, big nosed cunt like you? I wish mother had fucking miscarried you, you plum faced shit. I could have been Mr. Nintendo. I could have... no.... I fucking should have been the star. Me! Luigi! Life would have been better if you were squeezed out of mom's cunt as a dead, undeveloped foetus!!!

Covered in blood and guts.

I hate you, 'brother', and I wish you'd never been born. I wish only Luigi was in town. Then Waluigi would have meant something. WHY MUST I ALWAYS GET YOUR FUCKING HAND-ME-DOWN? YOUR FUCKING CASTOFFS. WILL WALUIGI EVER GET HIS OWN GAME? NO! BECAUSE HE FUCKING SUCKS. WELL I HOPE YOU AND THAT FAGGOT WARIO ENJOY YOUR ANAL SEX, WITH DICKS IN ASSES, BECAUSE ONE DAY I'M GOING TO GET A KNIFE AND I'M GONNA USE IT TO FORCE YOUR VERTEBREA APART.

One day, dear brother... one day.

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