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Operation: Help Out the Little Guys
Subject: Spinner
Website: The Oratory
Website Type: Wrestling Columns
Position: Site Administrator, Writer (once every year or so)
Twinkie Rating (1-5):    
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From: Nation Admin [admin@morphinenation.com]
To: 'spinner@oratoryweb.net'
CC:
Subject: An Offer You Can't Refuse
Dear Spinner,
I'm an administrator of popular website morphinenation.com. You most likely have heard of it or seen it linked. I stumbled across your own little website some time ago and, while not completely bowled over, in recent weeks I've been impressed enough to think that there's some rudimentary talent there. How long have you been in the business of writing? A year or so? It's very interesting to see you starting to bloom which is why I'd like to officially help nurture that process and build up to be a much better writer than you are. Get you to "Morphine Level" as it were. I'm officially inviting you to close down your own obscure site and come write for us.
Obviously you're not main page material level yet, but I can probably squeeze you into a less significant portion of the site, say, writing the occasional line for Madame Gonk. In fact, that might be perfect for you, as it's still a step up from your current position but not so huge as for you to get "stage fright", as it were. We're recently giving a great new talent, Heihaicharo Honda a tryout with his own section and, while it would be intriguing to offer you that sort of responsibility, we feel a little more practice would do you some good.
Before you join, however, we're of the opinion that "Spinner" is perhaps not suitable a handle for you. It's a witty play on your name, granted, but nobody wants wordplay anymore. It's all about the l33t speak. Work on that, actually, get some of that into you work. Your quality would improve with unintelligible letters and symbols thrown in. Back on track, the name. Might I suggest Gyrator? It's convenient as we already have an account on the forums set up in that name (complete with Strawberry Shortcake avatar). It would be quite convenient for you to make this alteration.
I trust you'll make the right decision and come work at Morphine Nation. I look forward to your speedy reply.
- Nation Admin
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