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Operation: Help Out the Little Guys
Hello and welcome to Operation: Help Out The Little Guys, with me, Morphine Jim. I had the idea for this a while ago, first as a throwaway joke, then as a serious idea for a cheap gag and possibly a bit of cynical exposure. With the arrival of Dis-B-Lief, however, we figured it was a perfect setup to go hand in hand with the movement's launch. The idea is simple - I email webmasters of sites that are about a hundred times more popular than I, contacting people who are more E-Famous than I will probably ever be, and I offer them a job working at Morphine Nation. In the most impolite of terms. We've contacted six cult internet figures and offered, in arrogant, pretentious terms, a chance for them to drop their respective websites and write under my wing, where I'll help them become far more talented and worthy human beings.
The email is generally the same for each of them, with one personalised paragraph talking about their names. Please peruse and enjoy. For those lucky contestants non-elitist enough to provide a reaction, they will be detailed here for your enjoyment. Thanks.
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"Little Guys" We've Tried to Help:
B (Progressive Boink)
Gabe (Penny Arcade)
Maddox (The Best Page...)
Ishkur (Ishkur.com)
Seanbaby (Seanbaby.com)
Matt (X-Entertainment)
Spinner (The Oratory)
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